I've Been A Professional Chef For 11 Years. Here's How To Modify An Order Without Upsetting The Kitchen Staff

Similar to attempting to order off-menu at a fancy restaurant, most modifications are frowned upon in many dining establishments. When I was a line cook at one of New York's busiest and most enduring kitchens, I would dread receiving a ticket with a modification. Working at that speed with that much pressure, it's easy to go into autopilot and plate your dish as it's set, completely forgetting "no dairy" or "no nuts" flags on the dish you've plated a hundred times. However, as a frequent diner, I understand the urge to ask to modify a dish. I don't do it often, but when I do, there are certain ways I go about it to make it easiest on the staff.

Out of all the dining etiquette mistakes you should avoid, having an unpleasant attitude is the biggest offender. My best tips for attempting to modify an order at a restaurant are to go about it in a kind and reasonable manner and to keep it as simple as possible. Rather than assuming or demanding a modification, kindly ask the server if it's possible first. If it's not, accept it with grace and ask if they can recommend anything else that fits your preferences or dietary restrictions. This must all be within reason, as I'd never suggest that you request a meat modification in a vegetarian restaurant. If you have a severe allergy, of course, you should let your server know, and the kitchen will likely omit the allergen from the dish if it's feasible, but sometimes, for safety purposes, things simply aren't possible.

It's important to consider the type of restaurant you're dining at as well. A local diner will likely have no issue swapping hash browns for home fries or fries for a side salad, but a high-end omakase restaurant that has a set menu is less likely to be able to accommodate any modifications or allergies that weren't requested ahead of time.

Here in Los Angeles, at smaller, trendy restaurants with shorter menus, I've often seen small, italicized script at the bottom of the menu that reads "substitutions or modifications politely declined." If you do see this or similar text on the menu, I strongly urge you to avoid attempting any modifications unless you have a true allergy. While it may be bordering on passive-aggressive, usually, restaurants do have solid reasoning behind this statement.

While some rules feel arbitrary and insulting, like the refusal to serve ketchup at Father's Office, declining modifications has more to do with small kitchen staffs and not wanting to compromise the integrity of the overall dish. If you ask to leave off or change the main feature from a dish, it may lead to a disappointing dish that doesn't reflect the caliber of the original item.

Modifications also affect the timing and rhythm of the overall kitchen. If your modification is a swap from fish to chicken, this will throw off the timing for not one but possibly two cooks, as sometimes seafood and other proteins are cooked by two different people, not to mention that fish cooks relatively quickly compared to other proteins.

Overall, be kind, patient, and understanding at a restaurant, no matter if they grant your modifications or not, as the industry is going through a difficult time.