Ask This One Thing At A Restaurant And Watch The Service Change

Whether it's a quick lunch with co-workers or a dinner with friends, dining out offers a fun opportunity to take time away from the kitchen and reconnect. That said, most of us have had an unpleasant night out when the service or the food were not what we had hoped for. From my perspective as a former restaurant worker and reviewer, there are a few things that we, as diners, can do to help make dining out a better experience. 

Anthony Bourdain wrote that politely interacting with servers is key to receiving good service, but you could go a bit further to enhance the experience. When the time comes to order, try asking your server for their opinion with genuine interest. This will show much needed empathy — after all, waiting tables is a demanding job that is not always as appreciated as it should be — and it can help you break away and try something new. 

Of course, there are a few things to keep in mind when asking your server for recommendations. For instance, they might be under pressure to sell certain items or they may recommend items which they like but that you might not. Remember that their job is to help you enjoy your meal as much as possible, so they will try to understand your likes and dislikes. Chances are that if you are honest and polite in your request, their answer will be equally honest and the interaction will be pleasant for all.

Waiting tables is not as easy as it may seem. Waitstaff work on their feet for many hours, running through the restaurant while splitting their attention between customers and other staff members. They must be aware of the status of every table to ensure they get what they need when they need it, timing out the meals so every party feels attended to. The last thing they need while handling the stress is a difficult customer hellbent on making both of their lives miserable. 

We're not saying you need to start a new friendship with your server or bombard them with conversation, especially if you start asking things the server will see as red flags, like inquiring about the cheapest meal. Simply have some empathy, be respectful, and interact with your server in a way that makes it mutually beneficial. For example, asking if they would choose the fish special over the fish on the regular menu is a good question which the server can answer honestly. 

Be as forthcoming as possible in expressing the sort of dish you'd like and explain ingredients you don't want, especially those to which you are allergic. Your server will be grateful, as clarity will make their job easier, too. This is especially helpful when you're trying a new cuisine and may be unfamiliar with the flavors. More times than not, your server will be happy to offer guidance.