Review: Cutwater's Chocolate Espresso Martini Is A Decadent Valentine's Day Sipper

Listen, I love being my own mixologist any day, but I'll never deny the sheer convenience of a tried-and-true canned cocktail option. A boozy bevvy that doesn't require me to clean a cocktail shaker and shot glasses after? Sign me up! If you're of the same ilk, let me point your attention to the latest offering from Cutwater: its canned Chocolate Espresso Martini.

The 13% ABV cocktail blends coffee cream liqueur with Cutwater's award-winning vodka to craft a smooth, sumptuous sipper for any occasion. And with chocolate flavor in the mix, it promises that extra "oomph" that can jazz up many a mixed drink. But how does it hold up next to the plethora of other pre-made espresso martinis on the market? I got my hands on a box of cans to test them and offer up my definitive opinion. Spoiler alert: I quite liked this can. 

Some recommendations are based on firsthand impressions of promotional materials and products provided by the manufacturer.

Don't worry — I'm no espresso martini newbie. The drink happens to be my dessert cocktail of choice. I've perfected my at-home recipe, and no, I'm not sharing (hint: It uses five ingredients, and three are boozy). I've had plenty of bartenders shake me up an espresso martini, and beyond that, I've gotten to sample a ton of bottled espresso martinis. All of which is to say, I know my way around the cocktail. 

I'll clue you in on my preferences. I like my espresso martinis to have a thick mouthfeel, gentle sweetness, and not too much astringency. Basically, I like to feel like I'm drinking dessert. If that's not your jam, take my opinion with a grain of salt. I'll compare this can to other pre-made versions of the drink I've had before, and will also judge whether it's worth buying based on that comparison. 

Though I'm not sure exactly how long Cutwater's Chocolate Espresso Martini will be around, I do know that it's not a permanent offering. The cocktail is releasing just in time for the Valentine's Day season, and it won't stick around for long — so if it sounds appealing to you, don't wait to get your hands on it. 

You can buy a pack (each of which contains four cans of the espresso martini) at local liquor stores that sell Cutwater's products, and prices will vary based on your location. In terms of the martini's nutritional information, each 12-ounce can has 540 calories, 38 grams of carbs, 14 grams of fat, 3 grams of protein, and 32 grams of sugar. 

Well, for a canned espresso martini, this checked off nearly every box for me. As you can tell just from looking at the above picture, it was ultra-creamy (which, yes, indicates that the can contains milk). It also struck a really good balance in its flavor profile. Chocolate was apparent but didn't overshadow the espresso; rather, it upgraded the drink, making it a little more decadent. 

Despite its rather exorbitant amount of sugar, I didn't think the drink tasted too sweet. That said, I hardly got any alcohol notes at all. I don't take a ton of issues with that, but I tend to like my cocktails to feel like, well, cocktails. The subtlety of the vodka is my one complaint about this can, but it's not nearly a big enough deal to dissuade me from enjoying it again. 

If you enjoy canned espresso martinis in general, I'd say go ahead and give this a try if you see it on your next liquor store run. The only consumers who might be disappointed would be those who like their drinks particularly strong, or those who prefer their espresso martinis on the thinner, darker side.

This can is definitely decadent, and it could almost fool one into thinking it had a very low ABV (if any at all). I will say, it's not often that I have a creamy pre-made espresso martini; usually, I have to craft one myself to get the optimal texture. I'd suggest shaking this with ice if you want to make it even creamier, but I was perfectly satisfied with a pour straight from the can. It's a yummy cocktail that would be easy to dress up with a chocolate rim (peppered with chocolate nibs, of course), or even a dash of peppermint spirit if you're a fan of the mint-chocolate combo.