Welcome to Short Order, Tasting Table's column for the next generation of adventurous food lovers.
While the Super Bowl is going down Sunday, you'll find me on the couch with my eyes glued to the real television MVP of the weekend: Animal Planet's annual Puppy Bowl. When you think about it, the two events are teeming with similarities. There are extensive pregame analytics, and you can create fantasy teams. Dibs on Miss Sassy, the Boston Terrier who's ready to tackle some fellow bitches on the field.
The human race is classically conditioned to consume snacks and television simultaneously. And while football has a monopoly on nachos and wings, the Puppy Bowl, for extremely obvious reasons, can have no other than puppy chow. According to its Wikipedia page, the cereal-based snack of childhood and dreams is also known as muddy buddies, reindeer food and monkey munch. None of these is on the Blue Ivy level in regards to nomenclature. I've eaten mud before; it's not great. Monkey munch? Don't monkeys snack on small insects they pluck from their friends' fur? Hard pass.
So let's stick to "puppy chow." To make your own, melt 2 tablespoons of butter, ¼ cup of creamy almond butter and ½ cup of dark chocolate chips in the microwave, so it forms one smooth, face-plant-able mixture. (You could be traditional and use peanut butter, but you're already defying all American standards by eschewing the Super Bowl, so keep that rebel spirit alive.) Add about 4½ cups of Chex cereal (I like honey nut, because it's sweet as all hell) and stir to coat. Put the mix in a Ziploc bag with 1 cup of confectioners' sugar and shake with intention.
There's going to be so much goop that it'll be near hard to handle. It might freak you out. It freaks me out. But it's all trapped in the bag, making it the superior snack choice to just-as-simple (and -messy and -delicious) Rice Krispies treats. Spread the cereal out on a cookie sheet to set completely then go to town while you fantasize about snuggling up to Wrinkles, the Shar-Pei running back.
Please note that no dogs were harmed in the making of this product.
Please check your inbox to verify your email address.