The Stanley Quencher H2.0 Cup You Are, Based On Your Zodiac Sign
We've all seen the memes, and no one can deny how funny Stanley Quencher H2.0 cup drinkers look while walking around holding water bottles bigger than their head. But, as I like to remind people, if it's helping you drink more water, what's the harm? Never mind how much water you should actually be drinking every day — because, as is made clear by the size of these trendsetters, the bigger the Stanley cup, the better.
At least you don't have to worry about them not fitting inside your cup holder. Plus, your ice will last for days. However, apart from size, Stanley cups come in every color and pattern you can think of. Heck, you can even get the entire thing bedazzled if you want.
And if there's one thing that will help get us off soda and on to drinking more agua, it's a personalizable, over-sized water bottle — look no further than the ongoing virality of Stanley drinkware to prove it. But, beyond what the mere act of owning one says about a person, with the variety of styles and colors you have to choose from, the very type you pick can say just as much, if not more.
Whether you've been eyeing the one in your Amazon shopping cart, or already pulled the trigger, there's a Stanley Quencher H2.0 cup for every taste, face, and, as it turns out, zodiac sign.
Aries
As the first sign of the zodiac, Aries prefers to be the first in every other aspect, too. Aries are fiercely competitive, and, being fire signs, are relentlessly passionate and determined. So, when you set your mind to something, you won't settle for anything less than the very best. In order to fulfill that need, it makes sense that you go with the most recognizable Stanley cup: The Quencher H2.0 in classic, hammerstone green.
Of all the colors of the rainbow you can choose for your drinkware, hammerstone green is easily the most iconic because of its vintage feel. If you didn't know it already, before Stanley cups became what they are today, they were popular with military servicemen during World War II — so, not only does this color look good, but it's also the most classic. Because, unlike Stanley's exclusive new line of colors, the hammerstone green option ties well into the brand's history. I'm sure this sounds like music to your ears, Aries, and you can take great satisfaction in having the most popular Stanley drinkware of all.
Taurus
Being Earth signs, Tauruses are known for being stubborn and loyal — and considering how durable and heavy the Stanley Quencher H2.0 is, you could certainly go with any one of the cups available. The thing is, though, Tauruses are also known for being reliable. That isn't to say that all Stanley Quenchers don't have the same quality (it's quite the opposite actually); but for you, Tauruses, the kind of Stanley cup you identify with is one that you can always depend on: stainless steel.
Vacuum-sealed, dishwasher safe, and insulated enough to keep drinks hot for seven hours, or cold for 11 hours, there's no denying a Stanley cup's reliability. But, the stainless steel option is especially so. Not only does it go with any outfit, but because it's steel, it's also highly durable (not to mention the reminiscence to your Earth sign nature).
Gemini
Like all the zodiac signs, Geminis have their own set of stereotypes — but the running one, unfortunately, seems to be that you're two-faced. The truth is, though, that Geminis are simply incredibly social and curious people. The reason why you're represented by twins (or sometimes a symbol of two masks, hence the 'two-faced' idea) is because, in order to be and do everything you want to do, you'd need a clone. Other than that, you are fun, fast-moving, and have a sweet childlike quality.
Even though the two-faced rumors may not be true, what better way to get back at the haters than to play into it with a Stanley Quencher cup? For that reason, if you were any one of the color options, you'd be one of the gradient ones. The color doesn't really matter — go for pink, blue, or green. Like your zodiac sign's Starbucks beverage, these Stanley cups appear in a gradient effect that makes them half-silver and half-colorful, and subtly acknowledge your overarching trait in a playful way.
Cancer
Like the crab representation that's synonymous with Cancers, you put up a tough act. You're incredibly self-defensive — but only because you have to be. While it may take time to break down your walls, underneath it all, many would be happy to find how genuine, caring, and loyal you are. Cancers naturally take on caretaking roles and you're often guilty of putting those you love before yourself. You're also notorious homebodies — meaning you can be found carrying your Stanley Quencher H2.0 from the kitchen to the couch, from the couch to the home office, and from the home office to bed.
But, if you were any Stanley drinkware in particular, you'd be the Target exclusive Valentine's Day option that's perfectly cherry red, just like the Cancer crab.
The Valentine's Day Stanley is exclusively sold at Target — and it's caused quite some chaos since dropping onto store shelves. Given that you are such homebodies, that's the kind of scene you'd probably like to avoid at all costs. But while the crowds, swarming, and grabbing aren't your style, Valentine's Day is. Emotional and sentimental, Cancers treat every day like it's a love fest, and Valentine's Day is just another excuse to spoil the people you love. The coordinating Stanley drinkware will just keep you hydrated as you do so, likely while snacking on your zodiac sign's go-to Valentine's Day candy.
Leo
There's a lot to say about Leos, but what seems to be the most common is that you're natural-born stars. This sign loves to be the center of attention — you're represented by the sun, after all. Vivacious, theatrical, and passionate, Leos are no stranger to the tabloids, either with names like Jennifer Lopez, Kylie Jenner, and Madonna boasting Leo status. But, while a Leo may come off as braggy, attention-seekers at times, the truth is that you only want to live your life to the fullest — and you're equally as happy to celebrate others doing so, too.
Knowing that, there's really only one Stanley drinkware for Leos, and that is the infamous bedazzled Stanley Quencher H2.0.
Given their size, any Stanley Quencher could, arguably, provide Leos with that bit of extra-ness you're so famous for — but a bedazzled Stanley takes it to the next level. All things sparkly and glam are totally on par, and what better way to live your best life than by drinking out of this showstopper? Coated in any color rhinestones you can think of, a fully bedazzled Stanley Quencher will run anywhere from $75 to $285, depending on where you get it. You could always grab a bedazzler and make it yourself. But, something tells me that's not a Leo's vibe. That is, unless, the type of wine for your zodiac sign is also involved.
Virgo
If Virgos are known for anything, it's for how productive they are. Big or small, you'll happily say yes to any task if it means you get to cross one more thing off your to-do list. Virgos love completing small jobs that contribute to something much larger, which is part of the reason why you tend to fall into healthy habits.
Knowing that, if any of the zodiac signs are committed to drinking more water throughout the day, it's you, Virgos — and that's exactly what Stanley Quenchers are good for. But, if you were any Stanley drinkware in particular, you'd be a Quencher H2.0 in the cream color.
The reason why Virgos are so productive is because you're extremely organized. From daily to-do lists to weekly planners, Excel docs to e-mail folders, you have a designated place for everything. You're also perfectionists, so not only do you get everything done on time and in order, but you do so without a flaw. Knowing how picky you can be, and your love of cleanliness, it only makes sense that your Stanley cup come in a color that is bright and clean-looking but also minimal.
Libra
Represented by the scale, Libras are obsessed with balance. It's what makes you such talented stylists, decorators, and art collectors. But it's also the reason why you're so intent on developing strong relationships. Libras crave balance in every aspect — from work and pleasure to health and hobbies — but relationships are especially important. Libras find balance in companionship, and you crave having someone by your side. Still, being the aesthetes of the zodiac, it wouldn't hurt if those companions also looked good.
While it may not be as much of a partner as a significant other, or even a pet, a Stanley drinkware cup will always be by your side. But, knowing Libras, you wouldn't be caught dead carrying one unless it was stylish and artful. For this reason, if you were any Stanley Quencher, you'd be the Naijel Gaph collab. Aside from Lainey Wilson, Gaph is the only artist to collaborate with Stanley thus far. The Tokyo-based artist is known for his "remix" design philosophy, where he redraws familiar images and objects and makes them new — which is exactly what he did with the Stanley Quencher H2.0.
Gaph's Stanley design features a hand-drawn logo against a minimal background of stainless steel and black, or all-black. It's exactly what you need to show that your Stanley cups aren't just water bottles — they're a piece of art.
Scorpio
Despite being loyal, smart, independent, and stoic, Scorpios also have a big reputation for being mysterious. Like actual scorpions, it's hard to know when you might strike. If anything, this means that Scorpios are great at keeping secrets — whether it's your own or someone else's. Still, knowing how drawn you are to danger and darkness, you can bet there's something juicy going on behind the scenes. It's part of what makes you so enigmatic to others.
While Stanley Quenchers aren't by any means dangerous — unless you whacked someone in the head with one — they can be dark. That's why, if the Scorpio were any Stanley cup, you'd be the Quencher H2.0 in black.
While it may not be as unique as the Valentine's Day color, or as hard to get your hands on, the all-black Stanley Quencher H2.0 is the perfect drinkware for Scorpios because it comes in your all-time favorite color: black. Not only will this Stanley cup match all your favorite clothes, it will also help you keep a low profile. As big night owls, a black Stanley Quencher will keep you hydrated as you go about your business, and you can splash some of your favorite type of coffee in it to stay awake, too.
Sagittarius
As the adventurers of the zodiac, Sagittariuses are likely to already have at least one Stanley drinkware cup stashed away for the next journey. Represented by the archer, you see life as a quest for knowledge, and every experience — whether it be positive or negative — is an opportunity to learn and grow. Knowing that, you tend to set goals that most people would consider impossible. Bold, curious, and optimistic by nature, Sagittariuses take the saying "go big or go home" literally. Coincidentally, that's something the Stanley Quencher takes literally, too.
While the 30-ounce and 40-ounce Stanley drinkware sizes are the most popular, and are probably more than big enough for most people, if the Sagittarius were any Stanley cup, you'd be the biggest size you can get — the 64-ounce special. As well, to represent your desire to understand the world, both spiritually and physically, you'd be a Quencher in the color rose quartz. Many people believe rose quartz carries vibrations that are beneficial to mood, and they're often used to boost meditation. So, not only will this Stanley cup keep you physically hydrated throughout all of your physical adventures, but it may also help enhance your spiritual growth, too. Still, I'd recommend you'd pack the best sandwich for your zodiac sign for the adventure as well.
Capricorn
It's no secret that Capricorns are workaholics. Driven, resilient, ambitious, and unapologetically confident, you have all the prerequisites for the role — however, what a lot of people don't know is that you are also big party people (if you can get them away from the office, that is). While it's true that, with time, Capricorns can learn to let go and have some fun, it's much more common later in life after you have achieved some degree of success. Until then, certain people, things, and parties that don't pertain to your career will be considered a distraction. Until then, you're much more likely to be at your desk, swamped with work, with a big Stanley Quencher by your side reminding you to take a break and hydrate.
If Stanley Quenchers are good for anything, it's to drink more water — something even the best of us can forget about when we're stressed at work. For the Capricorn, though, there's a Stanley Quencher in particular — one that will encourage you to have a bit more fun: the hot, Barbie pink color. Because just like Barbie, once you set your mind to it, you can do and be anything. Whether it be becoming an astronaut, a flight attendant, or a fashion designer, nothing is out of reach — especially not with the hot pink Stanley Quencher in hand.
Aquarius
Being the trendsetters of the zodiac, it wouldn't be surprising if Aquariuses had the it girl Stanley tumbler before it was cool. But you wouldn't be caught dead carrying one now. The thing is, Aquariuses value individuality over all else, and the thought of having the same water bottle as millions of other people would turn you off instantly. That's why, if you were any Stanley Quencher H2.0, you'd be the one that's the most rare. Without a doubt, that would be the limited-edition cherry red Starbucks Stanley Quencher.
Made in a shiny, red-toned stainless steel, the Starbucks Stanley Quencher makes quite the statement, which is exactly what Aquariuses are all about. You prefer to stick out from the crowd, and usually have the hairstyles and sense of fashion to do so. However, it's been reported that these cups — only sold inside Starbucks stores — sold out in mere days. So, if you want one now, it won't come cheap. Sold online by resellers for as much as $350, there's a good reason why not that many people have them.
Pisces
Mystical, intuitive, free-flowing, imaginative, and deeply emotional, the Pisces fully embodies what it means to be a water sign. But, not only are you the final water sign on the zodiac calendar, you'ren also the final sign in general — something that is believed to only enhance your water qualities. As the last sign on the zodiac calendar, it's been said that Pisces inherits all of the wisdom and life lessons of the signs that come before — only, you'd hardly ever guess it.
Pisces rely much more on feelings than logic, and couldn't be less interested in the superficialities of success or material gains. You simply want to love, create, and be. While those may not be sought-after qualities by most of society's standards, your challenge is to see that as your gift.
The primary way this positively manifests is through your creative abilities. Pisces make talented artists because your imagination is boundless. You have entire worlds within your heads that you're ready to bring to life. For that reason, if you were any Stanley cup, you'd be one that, like your soda brand, is as artistic as you are — AKA the Stanley Quencher in the warm serene brushstroke color scheme. Adorned in multi-colored, pastel-hued brush strokes, this Quencher looks about as dreamy as the Pisces. And with one, you can embrace your creative side all day, every day.