The Type Of Coffee You Are, According To Your Zodiac Sign
Coffee holds a very special place in many of our hearts. Some mornings, it may even be the one thing that gets you out of bed — or maybe that's just me. Even so, these days, coffee is hardly ever just coffee. From cold brew to drip, bird-friendly to fair trade certified, and light roast to dark, the type of coffee you drink can be a personality trait within itself.
Now I understand that, for some people, coffee may very well be just that — coffee. But even that's pretty telling about a person. If a crappy cup of coffee isn't enough to ruin your day you must be an incredibly optimistic person. That, or you're drinking something else. All jokes aside, we all have our vices in this world — caffeine being mine.
So, to all the self-proclaimed coffee snobs and caffeine-dependent people reading this, you should know that you're not alone. You should also know that, depending on your Zodiac sign, there's a type of coffee made just for you. Now's the time to put down the French press and keep reading.
Aries
Being the fire signs that they are, Aries tend to be hot-headed and competitive. It's no coincidence that they're the first signs of the zodiac because they want to be first everywhere else in their lives, too. To honor that, the type of coffee that an Aries would be is a piping hot cup of black coffee made from medium roast Arabica beans. Not only is black coffee the most popular type in the U.S., but among debates about which are the best, Arabica coffee beans almost always seem to come out on top.
Following suit, medium roast tends to be the most popular roast because of its full, yet balanced flavor — which should perfectly complement the Arabica beans' smooth, sweet taste, and bring out all of its chocolate and berry notes. Then, to give these signs an extra kick of superiority, that cup would be made in a drip coffee machine, aka the way most people in the U.S. like to make their coffee. Although it has had some competition with single-serve coffee pods, Aries should take great satisfaction in knowing it's still widely considered the best.
Taurus
Taureses seem to get a lot of criticism for being stubborn — but it's not without warrant. These signs love routine, and they can easily get set in their ways. It can be a tad frustrating for their friends and family who want to spend time with them because, while these signs do work hard, a lot of their free time is spent indulging in themselves. Taureses don't just love their R&R, they rely on it. With that, the coffee these signs would be is one that they can count on ordering at any time, and at any place. Which is why they'd be a vanilla cappuccino.
There's nothing like that first sip of your cappuccino in the morning. Something about the extra frothy milk feels extravagant, and a pump of sweet vanilla syrup only adds to that. While it might be a little basic, the best things often are. Not only does it have the perfect milk-to-coffee ratio, but the smell of vanilla is believed to have a calming influence on the mind, reminding us of happy memories that boost our mood and provide a feeling of well-being. Complimented by the bitter flavors of espresso and warm foamy milk, a vanilla latte is the perfect type of coffee for the Taurus — one they can get almost anywhere.
Gemini
Geminis are another zodiac sign that gets a lot of criticism. Represented by twins, they're often accused of being two-faced — but that's simply not fair. These signs have a childlike curiosity that makes them incredibly social and multifaceted. In so, they often find themselves wishing they could be in two places at once, hence the need for a twin. Alas, without one, these signs are always on the go, bouncing from one hobby, job, or social event to another. For that reason, just like this zodiac sign's Starbucks beverage, they'd be a type of coffee they can bring with them anywhere. That being said, I'd like to introduce them to the single-serve coffee bag.
Introduced in the 1970s and recently re-popularized by Emma Chamberlain, Gen-Z Youtuber, founder of Chamberlain Coffee, and fellow Gemini herself, single-serve coffee bags are the perfect type of coffee for Geminis because they're easy to throw in your purse or pack with you in your luggage when you're on the go. Added to a hot thermos or mug, you'll have a serving of coffee ready in minutes. But, they can also be added to cold water, which works great for these dynamic signs. Just like a tea bag, you can leave one or two of these bags in a carafe of water in your fridge overnight and wake up to a batch of cold brew that's ready to go.
Cancer
Despite being represented by the crab, Cancers are inarguably the most sensitive, emotional, and empathetic of all the zodiac signs. Most people won't get to see that side of them, however, because they tend to hide it behind a cold, distant facade. Underneath it all, they're only big softies — they care deeply, they're incredibly loyal, and they love being cozy. As natural homebodies, these signs crave comfort. Considering that, the type of coffee these signs would be is one that includes one of the most beloved comfort foods of all: chocolate. That's, right, they'd be a hot mocha.
What's a mocha, you might ask? It's a latte, only it gets an extra swirl of chocolate syrup stirred into it. On its own, coffee is already considered a comfort food, but that extra bit of chocolate takes it to another level. That's the reason why Ina Garten adds a bit of coffee to her chocolate cake. But, the same thing happens the other way around, too. By adding chocolate to your espresso, you balance out the bitterness of the coffee and allow all of the other fruity flavors in it to shine. That, along with some warm, freshly frothed milk, will provide all of the comfort Cancer's love.
Leo
Leos are the astrological calendar's summertime babies, and they have the personalities to match. They're ambitious, performative, prideful, energetic, and passionate. Some may see them as attention-seeking, but Leos can't help that they have a natural star quality to them. What really makes these signs so infectious, however, is their enthusiasm for life. Leos believe in living their life to the fullest. That's why, if they were any type of coffee, these signs would be a Frappuccino.
Made by blending espresso, ice, and milk, Frappuccinos very much embrace the Leo's way of living. Usually swirled with flavors varying from caramel to chocolate, and from vanilla bean to pumpkin spice, just like the Leo, Frappuccinos are made just a little extra by adding a generous helping of whipped cream on top of them. Not only are they cold from the ice and creamy from the milk, but they're sweet and caffeinated. They're a drinkable dessert — and a Leo never skips out on that.
Virgo
When it comes to personality types, Virgos are very much associated with Type A. They're the friends who make the brunch reservation, create the Excel docs for group trips, and write to-do lists like their lives depend on it — in fact, they're the ones to ask if you need something done because they'd love any excuse to cross one more thing off of it. While they may go overboard at times, every friend group needs one of them. Virgos get a lot of their self-worth from every little task they get done because they know it contributes to something much bigger. Which is why, if they were any type of coffee, they'd be pour-over coffee.
Compared to using an automatic coffee maker, pour-over coffee is often associated with being over-elaborate and over-involved. But just about every coffee snob will tell you it's well worth it for the quality of the cup you get in the end. It starts by preparing the coffee grounds and heating the water, wetting the filter, and setting up your scale, kettle, and pour-over cup. Once everything is prepared, you'll put the coffee grounds in the filter and use your scale to make four timed and weigh pours — each extracting the fullest flavor possible from your coffee. It's a lot of steps, and each requires a certain degree of precision, but it's true, that your coffee will taste phenomenal. The Virgo will take great delight in each step knowing what's in store for them in the end.
Libra
Libras are represented by the scale — which makes sense, seeing as these signs are obsessed with balance and symmetry. Not only are they known for being talented designers and decorators because of their eye for it, but it's something they seek to cultivate within themselves and within every aspect of their lives. All that being said, there's really only one type of coffee that a Libra could be, and that's the barista-favorite, and the espresso drink you should try on your next coffee run: the cortado.
Cortados often, and understandably, get confused for macchiatos and affogatos. While all are delicious in their own right, the cortado is unique from all other types of coffee drinks because of one thing, and one thing only: it's made with equal parts milk to equal parts espresso. Unlike your usual lattes and cappuccinos, which get about a cup of milk for every shot of espresso, cortados strike the perfect balance between the two. They're essentially mini lattes but without any sweetener and with a much more prominent coffee flavor. They're great for drinking alongside your dessert or if you want something between a straight shot of espresso and a latte.
Scorpio
Infamous for being deep and dark, there are quite a few types of coffee one might consider for the Scorpio. But, considering these signs are known for being night owls, they'd have to be one that you'd see people drinking into the night. For this reason, the type of coffee drink for this zodiac sign is also an alcoholic one. Rather than being your basic espresso martini, however, the type of coffee a Scorpio would be is a carajillo. As they say, once you've crossed paths with a Scorpio, you may never come back — and, in my experience at least, it's the same case for the carajillo.
Carajillos are a drink that originated in Spain, and although they might be considered a night-time beverage now — particularly in Mexico City — they were traditionally enjoyed in the early mornings and afternoons. Only recently has the drink been rebranded into one that's associated with nightlife, as the trend in Mexico found its way to the U.S., where it's now enjoyed as an upgrade to the already trendy espresso martini. The reason the carajillo is more so the coffee for Scorpios than the espresso martini, however, is because of its depth of flavors.
Carajillos are traditionally made with Licor 43, so they're deep in flavor — 43 of them, to be exact. These drinks deliver a forefront of espresso but with the added aromas of vanilla, chocolate, and citrus. They're enticing, to say the least, and they'll keep Scorpios going on their late-night excursions.
Sagittarius
There really isn't much bad you can say about the Sagittarius. That is, unless, eternal optimism is something you aren't a fan of. Sagittariuses have a way of seeing the positive in any situation. Incoincidentally, they're also considered to be one of the luckiest signs of the zodiac. So, when they set their sights high, it often works out in their favor. But it also makes them particularly adventurous, as they view every opportunity — good or bad — as a chance to learn and grow. It's why the archer represents them, and it's also why they're widely considered the best signs to travel with. For that reason, the type of coffee the Sagittarius would be is buna, an Ethiopian coffee.
When you consider all of the ways coffee is enjoyed around the world, it's obvious that, if you were to travel anywhere for it, it'd have to be Ethiopia. It's where coffee originated, after all. There, the Sagittarius will be able to learn all about its history and participate in an Ethiopian coffee ceremony — an hours-long preparation and tradition that's a daily ritual in Ethiopian households. That's where buna, also spelled bunna, is served. The coffee beans are roasted and ground by hand at home, blended with water, and poured into traditional cups. Typically it's drunk black and served alongside popcorn or a sweet bread called ambasha. It's a window into Ethiopian tradition and culture, which is sure to pique the Sagitarrius' interest.
Capricorn
Represented by the mountain goat and associated with the knees, it's no surprise that Capricorns are all about the climb — the corporate climb, that is. Widely known for being "workaholics," Capricorns are extremely driven in their careers. With names like Martin Luther King Jr., Dolly Parton, and Michelle Obama in their sign, they're also known for their ability to overcome adversity. Given that these signs work more than any other in the zodiac, their coffee has to be one that won't require them to step away from their desk for longer than 5 minutes. For that reason, the type of coffee that a Capricorn would be is the kind that comes in a pod, otherwise known as K-cups.
K-cups and coffee pods exploded in popularity during the early 2000s when the Nespresso patents started to lapse. Companies no longer had to invest in developing a machine — although some did, notably the Keurig — and could just start selling the pods that went in them. Even specialty coffee brands like Starbucks and Costa offer them. What makes them so popular, and so perfect for the Capricorn, however, is that they allow consumers to recreate the cafe experience in their own homes or offices — plus, there's a clever K-cup hack for a stronger brew, which these signs should put to good use. Simply fill the machine with water, pop in your pod, hit a button, and you have a hot, high-quality cup, ready in minutes, and for a fraction of the price.
Aquarius
Often confused for being water signs, Aquariuses are actually air signs. In so, they carry a lot of air qualities. But, interestingly enough, Aquariuses are represented by the water-bearer. So unlike their air sign friends, Gemini and Libra, they don't necessarily enjoy small talk, nor do they have any desire to be considered part of any one group or relationship. In fact, these signs value their individuality above all else. They tend to side with the most unpopular opinions possible and are much more interested in conversations about changing the world. Fortunately, as the water-bearers, the Aquarius is considered to be the humanitarian of the zodiac, so it's usually for the better. This is why, if they were any type of coffee, the Aquarius would be a bean-free one.
Bean-free coffee sounds a little counteractive — what is coffee without the coffee beans, anyway? Only the answer to a continued future of worldwide coffee consumption. In the face of climate change, the coffee industry stands in an interesting place. It is both a victim of the crisis and a contributor — making it partly responsible for its own demise. Bean-free coffee, however, is made through Atomo's patented process that doesn't require any mono-cropping or clear-cutting, nor is it climate-dependent — making bean-free coffee a stable, sustainable alternative for the future. Even without the beans, blind taste tests found bean-free coffee was preferred two-to-one, outranking other conventional brews. It's unique, future-forward, and good for the planet. That's why it's perfect for the Aquarius.
Pisces
As the final sign of the zodiac, Pisces are a mystical breed. It's believed that these signs inherit all of the acquired life lessons and wisdom from the signs before them. That, paired with their water-sign qualities, makes these signs incredibly intuitive. It's not always to their benefit, however. Oftentimes, the difficult emotions brought on by the physical world can be overbearing. That's when they escape —o the worlds they've created in their own heads, that is. Pisces are represented by two fish swimming in opposite directions, an image that is said to depict this sign's attention being constantly divided between reality and fantasy. For this reason, it's probably no surprise to know that, if the Pisces were any type of coffee, they'd be mushroom coffee — but more specifically, a chagaccino.
Spiked with 500 milligrams of wildly harvested chaga mushrooms, chagaccinos don't have quite the same effect as the mushrooms you might be thinking of. But chaga mushrooms are magical in a different way. Containing the highest antioxidants per gram of any other food, the chaga mushrooms infused into every chagaccino give your basic latte or black coffee a major upgrade — helping to reduce stress, boost your immunity, reduce fatigue, improve athletic performance, and refine your cognitive brain function. It also doesn't hurt that they're sweetened with monk fruit and flavored with cocoa. Combined with a shot of espresso and milk, you get a sweet, flavorful latte with all the adaptogenic benefits mushrooms are always being hyped up for.