14 Mistakes You're Making When Eating At A Japanese Restaurant

If you've been to your local hibachi place or all-you-can-eat sushi stop, you may think that you've got a pretty good handle on manners and Japanese dining etiquette. You might be shocked to learn that you might be wrong, however. Many unspoken rules reflect the culture's deep appreciation for food and craftsmanship, as well as the importance of respect, all rooted in hundreds of years of tradition.

But before you get too worried about it, read on to learn the most basic ways to act while enjoying the culture's incredible foods. Don't get too caught up in trying to be a perfect guest. You'll likely find that if your hosts understand that you're trying to be respectful, they will forgive many mistakes — enjoy your food rather than not eating because you're too intimidated. The Japanese place a lot of importance on the idea of making everyone feel comfortable; if your tablemates sense that you're just doing your best, they will respond in kind and encourage you to keep enjoying your meal.

There are all sorts of Japanese restaurants, from sushi to hibachi to izakaya, and you might encounter a few particular words during your time visiting them. We don't necessarily mean all the delicacies listed on the menu, however. What we're talking about are the general greetings and polite talk that you might hear during your meal.

At a sushi restaurant, you'll often be greeted by a delightful chorus of "irasshaimase" (welcome) from the chefs, which is a standard greeting. If you're feeling particularly international, feel free to reply with "ojamashimasu" (thank you for having me). Something else you might want to practice is the humble word "itadakimasu" which simply shows appreciation for the food and everyone that had a hand in preparing it, from the farmer to the chef to your server. Finally, once you've finished your meal, "gochisousama" is the proper way to say thank you. This is a way to thank the chef for cooking for you and shows that you were pleased with the food and service.

Always make sure that your elders and the special guests are served first, then work your way down to the youngest guests, and finally yourself. Read on for the rules about when it's okay to start eating without waiting for everyone else, but for now, let's talk about alcoholic beverages.

Japanese culture has a few rules around drinking. If you're simply out with your friends, you might find things a bit more relaxed but keep these notes in mind, nevertheless. First, never serve yourself a drink. In Japan, the first round, in particular, is served to everyone at the same time, and no one sips until kanpai is uttered and glasses clinked. When clinking your glass, try to ensure that yours is lower than your older or more superior business partners as a sign of respect. To continue drinking, waiting for others to refill your glass is still good manners. Refill the glasses of those around you when the time comes, and they'll repay the favor by replenishing yours. If you find your glass is still full when someone wants to replenish yours, take a quick sip so they can serve you.

While frowned upon stateside, there are certain occasions when slurping your noodles is perfectly acceptable in Japan. Dishes like ramen and soba are made with great care and are historically significant to the culture, and because of this, they have a few traditions surrounding them. Generally speaking, all restaurants in Japan will make the food as it's ordered to serve the freshest and hottest items possible. You'll receive a steaming hot bowl of noodles and broth and be expected to dig in right away.

By inhaling as you eat your noodles, you're simultaneously cooling the broth and also getting more of the broth in your mouth. The act of inhaling air also helps to bring out the most flavor from your food, giving you a fuller experience and a better appreciation for the dish. Finally, you should do your best to slurp up the entire noodle without biting into them. Biting them allows food to fall back into your dish, which is seen as rude. So, go give it your best shot and inhale, slurping up the whole mouthful at once.

You may have been taught that lifting your bowl to your mouth is bad manners, but in Japan, the opposite is true. You'll notice that a Japanese meal usually consists of a number of small plates and bowls rather than one large plate. This is to facilitate lifting your serving of rice, making it easier to eat with chopsticks without making a mess. It is considered rude to use your hand to catch food that falls from your mouth. Instead, you should lift your bowl closer to eat without spilling.

For something like soup, it is permissible to use chopsticks for the solid pieces and then sip the broth directly from the bowl. You're also always welcome to use a spoon, especially for something like curry rice. A good rule of thumb for what you can and can't lift to your mouth is this — anything that fits in the palm of your hand is made to be lifted, as well as donburi bowls (a rice dish served with stewed meat). Don't lift tempura, sushi plates, or anything communal or large. It is permissible, even encouraged that you lift soup containing noodles in order to avoid splashing everyone around you while you slurp up the delicious, soupy noodles.

Using chopsticks means that much of the food eaten in Japan must be served already cut into bite-sized portions. It is very rare to see a knife on the table; for that reason, everything must be ready to eat or have a soft texture that can be separated with a spoon. You shouldn't have much problem fitting each bite into your mouth without having to return pieces to your plate. If you come across a piece that is relatively large, it's more acceptable to eat it while covering your hand with your mouth instead of biting it in half.

Obviously, this isn't always the case, and some things will need to be eaten in a few bites, such as onigiri. These triangular-shaped rice balls are a popular on-the-go snack and are meant to be eaten out of hand, much like an American sandwich. In the case of something like this, you can simply unwrap it and carefully eat it with small bites. Holding the onigiri with two hands will help to keep it in one piece so that you're not dropping rice everywhere, too.

While sake is a category that rightly deserves to be explored, you should be aware that Japan offers a number of other tasty beverages as well. Sake is a rice wine fermented with koji — the rice mold responsible for mirin, soy sauce, miso, and rice vinegar, that has become ubiquitous with Japanese alcohol. In recent years, distillers have started turning out some impressive whiskeys, such as Suntori and Nikki. Be warned, though — these can be hard to find and occasionally are very expensive. However, if you're able to pick up a bottle of something attainably priced, we highly recommend that you try this version of a highball.

Other libations include ume plum wine, shochu, beer, and an emerging market of canned mixed drinks. As well, Japan has also started producing wine domestically rather than importing it, so you may want to give those a go, if given the chance. If you do happen to overindulge, don't be too worried about it. Remain respectful and subdued; slow down a little and you should be fine.

A final piece of cultural knowledge — typically in Japan, the person who makes the invite is the one who pays. This can seem hard to accept to those of us who are used to splitting the tab. But here, it's disrespectful to argue about who is paying. If you make a fuss about being treated to dinner, you're making it seem like your host can't afford it or is too cheap to pay. That's a big insult and can result in a strained relationship.

Having said that, there is nothing wrong with bringing your host a gift to thank them for their thoughtfulness and the invitation. This is a gracious way to recognize the culture of giving and receiving, as well as showing your appreciation for their hospitality.